Have you ever been to one of those painting classes where an instructor teaches you and your group how to paint a particular painting, and you paint it right there in class? Neither had I, until this past week. A friend of mine had her birthday party at one such venue, and I thought it sounded like a lot of fun. So, despite the fact that I know I’m not a very good artist, I decided to go.
“It’s easy!” everybody said. “It’ll be fun!”
It was a lot of fun. And it was easy to follow the instructor’s directions. I listened carefully and followed her directions as best I could. Which doesn’t explain why her painting looked like a professional painting, and mine looked like…well, like exactly what it was: a painting by someone who had never attempted to do something like this before.
“It has character,” I told my husband as I was driving home. “But don’t worry: we don’t have to hang it up or anything.”
“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Phil said. When I arrived home and displayed the actual picture, he said, “It looks great!”
What I saw when I looked at it were the places where the brush strokes were a little too wide, the grass was a little too long, or the sky was a little too blue. In other words, the imperfections.
My kids didn’t see the imperfections. “Cool!” Ellie exclaimed when I showed it to her. “Who painted that?”
“I did,” I said.
“Wow! Cool!” she repeated.
The other kids’ mouths dropped open when they found out I painted it. “That’s amazing!” Kenny exclaimed. “I didn’t know you could paint like that!”
I was actually starting to be a little proud of my painting, with its imperfections and all.
We’re going to hang that painting up after all. Not because it’s a technically perfect painting (it isn’t), but as a reminder to me that even when I can’t perform perfectly, overall, I still do a lot that is right and worthy of admiration, especially by my children.
We as moms are often hard on ourselves, especially when it comes to motherhood. When we look at the job we’re doing, all we see are the mistakes. The times we yelled or lost our temper. The times we didn’t have patience, or weren’t creative, or said something we shouldn’t. We look at our motherhood and we see a picture that doesn’t look quite right.
Our children, on the other hand, probably see something very different. Sure, they know we make mistakes, but they have an entirely different perspective. They look at the job we’ve done, and they say, “Cool!” or “That’s amazing!”
To them, it doesn’t matter whether our motherhood looks exactly like someone else’s or is technically perfect (which isn’t possible, by the way). They’re much easier on us than we are on ourselves. They look at us and see “Wow!”
True, when we sin, we need to confess it. When we make a mistake, we need to rectify it. But the fact that we make mistakes sometimes, and sin sometimes, doesn’t mean the whole picture is ruined. Instead of frantically trying to muster up our own abilities to make the picture perfect and pleasing to our God and our children—and being afraid we still won’t be able to do it—we need to trust in the perfection of the One Who has called us to motherhood and will strengthen us and equip us with everything we need to do the job well.
When I see that picture hanging on the wall near my desk, I’m going to remember the fun time I had at the painting class. I’ll probably also be tempted to see the imperfections. But I’m going to resist that temptation. Instead, I’ll remind myself how cool my children think the picture is. And I’ll remember that being a good painter—just like being a good mom—doesn’t mean that I have to be perfect.
Isaiah 41:10—Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (ESV)